Did you get that internet I sent?

There is perhaps nothing more frightening at the moment than suffering the bunch of crusty old shits in Congress, who know nothing about almost everything and absolutely nothing about internet technology, deciding the fate of the net. The people in Congress are so utterly ill-equiped to make any assessment regarding IT, no one really knows just what is going to come out of the current wrangling in Senate Commerce Committee, which is currently locked in an 11-11 tie over net neutrality amendments. Like they even know what the fuck that means.

Doubt this? Am I overstating the ignorance of our idiot "leaders" in Washington? Well, here's pork barrel specialist, the man who brought America the $450 million Alaskan "bridges to nowhere," Senator Ted Stevens (R-AK) giving us his take on the issue. If you have any idea what he is talking about, please let me know in the comments. I suspect, though, that since Stevens has no idea what he is saying, you won't either. In all its gory detail, I recommend you read it all. You won't want to miss any of Steven's princely brain droppings:

There's one company now you can sign up and you can get a movie delivered to your house daily by delivery service. Okay. And currently it comes to your house, it gets put in the mail box when you get home and you change your order but you pay for that, right.

But this service isn't going to go through the interent and what you do is you just go to a place on the internet and you order your movie and guess what you can order ten of them delivered to you and the delivery charge is free.

Ten of them streaming across that internet and what happens to your own personal internet?

I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday. Why?

Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the internet commercially.

So you want to talk about the consumer? Let's talk about you and me. We use this internet to communicate and we aren't using it for commercial purposes.

We aren't earning anything by going on that internet. Now I'm not saying you have to or you want to discrimnate against those people [...]

They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the internet. And again, the internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck.

It's a series of tubes.

And if you don't understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and its going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

Now we have a separate Department of Defense internet now, did you know that?

Do you know why?

Because they have to have theirs delivered immediately. They can't afford getting delayed by other people.

[...]

Now I think these people are arguing whether they should be able to dump all that stuff on the internet ought to consider if they should develop a system themselves.

Maybe there is a place for a commercial net but it's not using what consumers use every day.

It's not using the messaging service that is essential to small businesses, to our operation of families.

The whole concept is that we should not go into this until someone shows that there is something that has been done that really is a viloation of net neutraility that hits you and me.

Wired provides an audio link to this mindless blathering, which I'm quite certain is even more halting and incoherent than it looks on the page. Venture there if you dare. Based on this alone, I don't hold much hope that Congress will maintain net neutrality at all. How can they? They have no idea what it even means.